What we do, Miss Ventura, does not define who we are. What defines us is how well we rise after falling.

The last couple of weeks have been challenging and I have had to make some important decision in my life. I have actually been searching for answers. Getting answers when you need one is like the ‘credit system’. When you don’t need the money everyone comes and gives you money, but when you really need it, they run away from you! Ironic isn’t it? I came home this evening and started watching a movie. The movie was ‘Maid in Manhattan’, not much to talk about. But a couple of dialogues got my attention. After Marissa (Jennifer Lopez) gets fired, the hotel manager who also quit says, ‘What we do, Miss Ventura, does not define who we are. What defines us is how well we rise after falling’.

Normally this dialogue would not have struck a chord. But, I guess given my mental state of mind, it resonated. How true, we go through life doing a lot things – personally (spouse, father, friend) or professionally. But really, what defines us is how well we react after spikes in our life, especially after we fall. How well we rise after we fall? I think we all over use the phrase ‘falling in love’. If falling is part of love, then why do so many people run when they think they are falling in love or despair after their love has fallen? Have you been defined by how well you rise after a relationship has fallen? I am using ‘relationship’ loosely; it is not just between lovers, but also between friends, colleagues, employees, etc.

The second dialogue that I think was worth mentioning, was ‘What l can’t figure out is, are you running towards something you want? Or are you running away from something you’re afraid to want?’.  I think we spend majority of our time in our life running for something (goals, aspirations, relationships) or running away from something (job, goals, relationships). Would it not be nice, if we can actually pause and take in the ‘PRESENT’? Do you think we all would be happier if we save our energy from running and channel our energy in LIVING?

Do we spend too much time, thinking that our current job or relationships sucks and hope to find some thing or someone better? Where did we get this human trait? How did we get wired not be contended with the present? Or is this the fundamental trait that separates us from animals? I put this to test with respect to myself. I spend a lot of my time running to what I want – grow the company, get financial stability so that I can take care of my family, build relationships/network. But what I really want… Here in lies the problem; I don’t know what I really want. Or maybe, I am not ready to admit what I really want? So probably, I am running away from anything that remotely feels like what I really want, so that I don’t have to face it.

If we did a poll of every one in the world, it will be amazing to see the ratio between people running to what they want and those running from something they are afraid to want?  80:20? What do you think?